I certainly don’t believe that this can be the explanation. And this could only have been written by a millennial, so, no I don’t subscribe to that in any way. I do notice that I am using the term millennial as a pejorative term, but I hope you get the sense of what I am saying. And, no, I don’t believe in ghosts.
I had faced a lot of problems in my life before, but what can be called the 21st Century version of Zersetzung or psyops or the 21st Century version of COINTELPRO began personally for me after a wrote a scathing article about the events of 2002, well known in India. The article was written, if I recall correctly, towards the end of 2002 or somewhere near that. It was published as feature in a progressive activist magazine (focusing particularly on gender injustices, but also other topics). A four (newspaper size) page supplement was also brought out that had this article as the main feature. It was distributed around the locality where I was staying at that time (the editor was also staying in that locality, but I never met him).
Since then, it seems I have made many enemies, simply by talking and writing.
Why would I be singled out? That is what I also want to know, but my guess is that I am almost isolated and have no alliances or influential friends, nor do I try to have them. That makes me (and people like me) fair game for anyone and everyone.
The Initially, it was basically annoying. Then it started getting worse. There were periods when it almost seemed to have stopped. But, on the whole, it has been getting worse. Now, it has reached such levels, as to be considered seriously life threatening. I simply can’t live a normal life (normal even by my standard). The fact is, I don’t know how long it can go on. Anything can happen any moment. In any case, it has been happening slowly anyway, which is the essence of Zersetzung. The word literally means ‘biodegradation’ (in this context, of humans), that is, death by biodegradation. There cannot be a more psychopathic term. But it’s not just a term. It is my current life and has been for many years.
A long ago I had hinted at what I feel about this (seeing the bright side).
The reason I am writing at this point and in this form is that I don’t know whether I will get the chance to write it the way I wanted, or may be not write it at all.
What your read or see here is only small glimpses of what I have been going through. Some things I can’t even write, either because people will be hurt or because they are extremely difficult to believe and proof is hard to come by.
A couple of years ago, I go to a barbershop. While I am having a haircut, a funeral possession passes by outside the shop. It stops just in front of the shop and the corpse is put down for some time. One person looks out and the other asks:
Yeh vahi hai jisne phansi laga li? [Is he the same one who hanged himself?]
The other one answers:
Han. Kya karen maan hi nahim raha tha. [Yes. What can be done, he was not complying (or falling in the line)]
About an year ago, I go to another barbershop. While I am having a haircut, there is something playing on the TV. One of the character says:
Mera boss meri girlfried par line maar raha hai. Kya karun? [My boss is trying to seduce my girlfriend. What should I do?]
A person in the shop says:
Aatmahatya kar le. [Kill yourself.]
After a particularly horrible day (around 22nd June), when some things happened that are almost indescribably horrific, as I come out of my office, a few people also come out and walk just ahead of me.
One of them says:
Ab ye suicide karega. [Now he will commit suicide.]
Another among the group says something like this:
Suicide kar le to accha hi hai. [It’s good if he commits suicide.]
In another city (July 25th), after coming out the parents’ house where I stay there (what we in India call the real home), on the way to the train station, there are two people near to me and one of them says:
Ab ye marega. [Now he will die.]